YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME No. 5
"Too Many Baby Daddies"

Yesterday, I was driving up I-35, one of the major highways running through Dallas, and I saw a billboard that said, "Want to know if you're the father? Call 1-800-DNA blah, blah, blah." Seriously? And it's not the first board I've seen in Dallas with that message. Now, I don't know what paternity tests cost, but I do know billboards in those locations can run $4,000-$5,000 a month. Which begs the question, are there really so many people having indiscriminant pregnancies that it justifies $10,000 a month in advertising costs?

Outdoor is a broad reach, less targeted medium for the most part which means either A) the Paternity test company doesn't have anyone who understands demographics and targeted marketing, or B) there really are enough deadbeat love 'em and leave 'em fathers (or knocked up mothers) rolling up and down I-35 every day who need information about where they can answer the $64,000 question.

Don't know about you, but I find that sad and a little infuriating. Maybe we can convince them to do a package deal and throw in a free vasectomy with every paternity test!